I am not a big fan of flying to begin with but If I fly anytime soon and I had to choose between the pat-down or the body scanner, I will with no doubt choose the pat-down. In the scanners’ case it is not the privacy issue that is going to hold me back, that is the least of my worries, I don’t care if you have a picture of me naked. I mean who cares if you have a naked souvenir picture of an old wrinkled man in his 70s like me. But what I don’t like in this process is the exposure to X-rays. I have tried for years and years as much as I can to avoid X-rays and Buffalo chicken wings because they cause cancer, especially if there is not enough ranch to go with the wings.
The other day I went to get my teeth cleaned and the dentist almost cried while he was begging me to accept taking a couple of X-rays for my teeth. In the first 30 minutes of his begging I was telling myself this bastard wants me to get exposed to radiation just so he could make a couple of bucks more. But then he started explaining how he wants to determine if there is bone loss or not to decide on the cleaning method to be used and the poor guy went into a deep medical lecture explaining most of what he learnt in dentistry before I hesitantly said yes. I don’t know how I was able to make him feel so guilty that he was apologizing for everything he did after the X-rays. To make a long story short, X-ray in my eyes is not a joke and that is why I tell you if you want to touch my junk go ahead and do it but if you haven’t had bought me lunch the night before I just ask for no eye contact afterwards.
P.S. I am not that old, wrinkled and ugly. As a matter of fact I am freakishly handsome; a copy cat of Fabio. Even if you don’t know Fabio the name itself is going to get your imagination going.. PERVERT!
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